Welcome
to Day 25 of our Meditation Retreat.
Yesterday
we spoke about learning from the true teacher. We spoke
about the special quality the true teacher carries, and
that they have become the message. What I want to talk about
today is; working with the true teacher, how important it
is to look at the relationship between you and the teacher;
and learn how to work in that relationship, so that you
can become, all that you can be.
A
Working relationship with the true teacher
When you have found a true teacher, a good leader, someone
who has mastered the art, who has become what he teaches,
then you have a great opportunity to develop your full potential.
Are you using that opportunity in the best possible way?
This is an important question to ask, because this is the
whole process of management. Are you managing the process
by which you are developing? For me, that is an extremely
important observation.
I had
spoken before about how we can learn from all kinds of situations
around us, and how every one can be a teacher, in a way.
We can learn from people who challenge us or from situations
when our backs are against the wall. Then our weaknesses
come into visibility. But it is more difficult to learn
from those situations because we may not see them as teaching
us something, and the process may seem to be unmanageable.
When you come in contact with someone who can teach you,
and who is willing to teach you, and is committed to teaching
you, you come into a very special process. It is because
the person’s attention is on you, and the relationship
is one of learning and growing. Here both sides are committed
to the process. When there is that kind of relationship
it is a very important one. It is a relationship of growth
and development, where there is someone who is interested
and committed to your development.
Managing
the process of learning
This is unlike the open process where you need to become
more aware to learn or you need to take more responsibility.
If there is some event in your life, for example, that really
challenges you, like maybe a disease, you may not see it
as a teacher. It may be so overwhelming that the whole process
is not developmental for you, when indeed it can be. However,
when you have a teacher looking at you and working with
you, then that becomes a managed process and so greater
learning can take place. It is therefore important in that
process, for you to do your part as a student in the best
possible way.
Always
remember that the goal of this process is to become like
the teacher or the leader, otherwise you will lose out from
that process. The teacher may not always be there with you
for the purpose of teaching, so the existence of the relationship
is an important time to use every moment of it.
Of
course, we need to be very careful that we do not put the
greater responsibility on the teacher and less on ourselves.
We may wait for development and for the teacher to tell
us something but we may never be told. So it is extremely
important for us to try to work the process. We should try
to manage the process. We should look at the goal, which
is to become like the teacher. The goal is to become at
least as good as the teacher.
Understanding
and working the process
In that process we need to ask ourselves, “Am I learning
in this process? Am I taking responsibility in this process?
Am I growing in this process?” We need to be able
to see very clearly, and to use every opportunity to begin
to develop ourselves. For example, you are learning the
art of meditation. You practice it every day, are you waiting
for something to happen, or are you waiting for the teacher
to tell you something new, when you should be managing your
process. You should be asking questions, practicing what
you have learnt, and also observing the process, monitoring
it by asking, “Am I growing? Where am I supposed to
go?”
We
observe the teacher of meditation. We observe the state
of the teacher “Is this teacher really practicing
what he speaks about? Does he really live the process? Has
he become the meditation?” If he has, then we have
the model before us. We know “This is where I want
to go; this is what I want to be.” We need to question
the process sufficiently, to be able to understand it.
Monitoring
and taking responsibility
When we have understood the practice, then we need to get
involved in the practice and to monitor ourselves, “Am
I progressing? Day by day, week by week, month by month,
year by year, am I progressing?” Then if we become
confused, we have the opportunity to clarify things with
the teacher, “Can you tell me about this? This is
what I am experiencing. Can you give me an idea of what
the next step is and what to practice?” And so we
begin to work with the teacher, taking responsibility and
monitoring the process, instead of waiting for the teacher
to do this. So not only when the teacher says to practice,
do we practice, but we look for every opportunity that exists,
to practice.
A
good student grasps every opportunity to practice
Let us say that you are learning about relationships from
the teacher or leader. You have all the ideas of how a relationship
should be. Do you really look for every opportunity in your
sphere, even the challenging ones, and say, “Let me
begin to practice”. Do you also solicit feedback,
for example, even from the challenging relationships? Do
you think, “I can create a better relationship with
you? Can you tell me whether you are happy with me or not?
What is your opinion of me? Can I do anything that will
create a better relationship between us?” In this
way you really begin to put this into practice in every
opportunity you have. That is a good student.
Learning
is becoming
The whole idea is that learning is becoming. To learn is
to become. You know the steps in learning from a teacher.
If you really want to become the steps in learning from
the teacher, first you listen well to whatever is being
given to you. Consider it to be precious if it is coming
from a true teacher. Listen well, and of course clarify.
Ask again until you are very clear. Don’t just go
away with this too quickly.
Illustration
with a story
There is a wonderful story to illustrate this point. It
is about the King of the gods and the king of the demons,
they went to a great teacher to learn about the Self. They
had heard that the Self is a place, where you can go and
achieve anything you want. They were both therefore very
curious to learn about the Self, so they went with their
request, to this teacher, who knew all about the Self.
The
teacher told them to go to a nearby pond, and look into
it, and they would see the Self-reflected. They did as they
were told. They saw their bodies and thought to themselves,
‘This is the Self, this is what we need to take care
of and honour’. They both returned and said to the
teacher, ‘we have seen ourselves’ and they described
their appearance. Of course, one was demonic and the other
beautiful. The teacher said, “Certainly, your Self
is reflected there.” They both went away happy that
this was all they had to do. Honour and satisfy the body,
and all happiness would be there.
The
king of the demons was very happy with this philosophy of
pleasure and power. But the king of the gods thought ‘something
is certainly not right about this teaching because this
body is going to grow old, become diseased and will die.
This can’t be the Self. If I pamper this body and
give it all that it wants, it will still become old and
diseased; this can’t be the happiness that is attributed
to the Self.’ So he went back to the teacher and said,
“Please Sir, this can’t be the truth. This body
is subjected to aging and disease.” The teacher said,
“You are right. There is more. Stay with me for a
few years and I will teach you.”
The
king of the gods stayed for some years with the teacher
who taught him a little more but still not the full teaching.
More time passed as the teacher gave his teachings in small
segments, before teaching him everything. Of course, I am
just narrating this story as an illustration. I can’t
give the full details of the story here.
The
king of the demons was satisfied with the philosophy of
looking after the body and idolizing it. He went away never
questioning, but the king of the gods began to question,
“Is this all? There seems to be some fault in this
explanation” But the teacher was testing him each
time, to see whether he was really listening.
Listen,
Contemplate, Practice
You need to listen completely and to ask questions. The
second part is contemplation. When you learn something,
begin to contemplate it, “How do I put this into practice?
What does this mean to me?” You need to be very clear
about how to use the information that you have. The teacher
teaches us how to meditate. We ask every question that we
can in that moment until we become very clear about the
practice.
The
third part of this is actually doing it - putting yourself
into the practice until you begin to realize it. And that’s
where the developmental stage comes. If the knowledge only
stays in the head as theory, then how are you going to experience
the fullness of the knowledge? So the practice becomes very
important. Then you work with the teacher as you begin to
practice.
These
three steps are very important: learning to listen well;
to gather information; to ask questions, to be very clear.
Next begin to think how you can translate it into activity;
how can you put it into practice. Let that be clear before
practicing.
Becoming
the true teacher
Therefore, when you are in the presence of such teachers,
the opportunity to learn and become, is always very present.
Are you using that to the best of your ability? The whole
idea is to finally become just like the teacher, not to
become dependent on the teacher. When the teacher is not
around, you become the teacher. You feel the fullness of
the ability within you, and you begin to work in the awareness
of it. That’s when you become the teacher.
The
whole idea in the learning process is not to be fed all
the time. There is the saying, that if you teach a person
to fish, you feed them for life. Give them a fish and you
feed them just for a day. The whole idea of the learning
process is to learn how to fish. So working with a teacher
is an important process, and you as a student, have to manage
the process.
The
intensity of your desire to learn will give you the motivating
power to work the process. You need to always ask yourself,
“Am I becoming complacent? Am I just enjoying gathering
information? Or am I using the information and developing
myself” Soon enough the time will come, when the teacher
may not be there and you need your own inner guide to be
awakened. You need to become your own teacher.
Learning
is transformation
Whenever you are in any learning process, it is good to
observe, “Am I taking any responsibility? Am I growing?
Am I learning and developing? You also need to learn how
to work this process, so you need to use every moment you
have in that process, to the best of your ability. This
is how I learned.
When
I met this teacher whom I really respected, I thought to
myself, “Here I have an example before me; how can
I become this?” And I worked very intensely with every
word of the teacher. I observed the whole process of how
the teacher lived, thought and acted. I used every opportunity
to become like the teacher. This is something for you to
think about. How important it is for you, to take responsibility
for managing the process, when you have the opportunity
of working with the teacher.
I want
to wish you a divine day everyone in the company of each
other. Think of what powerful company we have.
